I woke up this morning to a few fresh inches of snow, and it's still falling. As I sit from my perch in my second story window reading my Bible and praying and watching the world that is my neighborhood wake up, my eyes are greeted with a fresh blanket of snow covering the dry brown earth underneath it. It is beautiful. It's also just plain NUTTY. Saturdays high temp was in the SEVENTIES. We're talking warm. Like, sun's out, guns out, aka tank top weather. Then yesterday morning a cold front moved in and in began to snow.
Things change quickly in Denver.
And not just the weather.
I've been trying to find a way to write this out for over a month and I just haven't been able to, so I guess I will just plunge in and then try to make sense of it all.
The Road Church will have its last Sunday service this coming Sunday.
Whew. There. I got it out. Man that was HARD. So here's the deal. I will try to explain it the best I know how. Our original vision for coming here was from Luke 24 where the disciples were walking away from Jerusalem dejected that Jesus had died. Probably disillusioned. Maybe frustrated. Definitely DONE. And Jesus MET THEM ON THE ROAD (hence the name of our church). He met them where they were at when they weren't even looking for Him, because He was looking for them. And He explained Himself through the Scriptures. So that was our heart in coming here. Come alongside people and tell them that Jesus is already walking with them, wanting them to understand His love and his character and nature in a real and full sense. And I believe that we have tried our best to be obedient to that command. Are we without sin? Uh, NO. Are we without mistakes. Double no. Have we perfectly fulfilled the purposes of God in this place in this season? Nope. But we HAVE leaned hard into Him, loved Him, and desperately, achingly, wholly loved His people here. We have seen people get saved, people go from a struggling relationship with Jesus to a vibrant one filled with purpose and hope. I've watched seven year olds get excited about reading their Bible every night at their own house. I've watched Seth become a little evangelist. Straight up. The kid is bold and it's awesome cause he is doing it in love and kids are getting saved! I've watched Abigail grow into such a young lady of encouragement. When the kids in our neighborhood got saved, she continued to check in with them to ask what they're reading in the word and how they're doing. And it's so natural and sweet to watch. I dont have enough time or enough emotional energy to write out all of the beautiful things we have seen God do here, but it has been sweet and amazing. For those of you supporting us in prayer or otherwise, please know that it was not in vain and that Jesus has moved mightily.
But a few months ago, we felt a shift. We just felt a stirring to LISTEN to Him, that He had something to tell us and that we needed to be open and vulnerable to just listen. So we began to listen and pray and fast and cry as we realized that Jesus was telling us that our season at the Road Church would not be forever. Last fall, both Christian and I felt God speak to us through a bible study on Elisha that we were to stay put and continue to love on and pour into and enjoy our sweet congregation, but that the flow of the Spirit would be shifting and that He wanted us to do something different.
We sat on that for a while because we didn't know the timeline. Hey, for all we knew, it could be years from now. But Jesus is sweet and didn't let us stay sitting on it for long. In January, we tried to start up a men's and women's bible study and a few new things and the Spirit just plain said "NO." We were startled and began to fast and pray again and He spoke so clearly. This is done. I am moving into a beautiful new thing. Will you go with me?
As we prayed, we knew that Jesus would take care of the details so we announced to the church mid January that we would finish the book of 1 Peter and that our last service would be February 22nd. As a group, we talked about helping them to get plugged in somewhere else where they would get good teaching and good fellowship. As leaders, the Bedfords and the Phillips and of course we have tried out different area churches. Because as I prayed over what would happen to these sweet people that we have fellowshipped with these past two and a half years, the Lord gave me a vision of seedlings in a window box. And I just saw that they were healthy and happy there, but it was time to be planted in a larger garden where they could thrive. Jesus is sweet to give us reassurances that we are not just hurting them. I think that is probably my biggest fear in all of this, is to hurt someone. But we have to do what Jesus says to do! So we are.
Are there issues of sin that are behind the closing of the doors? NO. Double and triple, NO. No one has done anything to disqualify themselves from serving. I just wanted that to be out there so no one wonders. I mean, yeah, we sin and mess up but not the kind that gets you booted out of serving. Just the kind that drops us to our knees in repentance and dependence on the Spirit.
Are there practical reasons why we are shutting the doors? Yes. But those reasons aren't too big for God to work out. He could have intervened if He wanted to. We are shutting the doors simply because He said to. It wasn't a decision we made, but a command that we are obeying.
So please pray for us. That these wonderful people who have become like family to us would find a home church and really dive in and belong and grow and flourish. We just desperately want to see them flourish. Please pray that WE would flourish. You see, we don't feel like Jesus is done with the mission He gave us. We aren't done with ministry. We believe that we were called here to live life alongside people, to love them, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, and MOSTLY to pray our guts out for the people and for the city. Although Christian deeply loves to teach the word of God, we both realize that he doesn't have to be behind a pulpit every Sunday to be fully immersed in the mission Jesus sent us to do. We truly believe what we have been telling people for years: the most ministry happens outside of the church walls. The church is there to equip the saints for the work of the ministry. The ministry happens at work, in line at Sprouts, in the doctors waiting room, at the rec center after school. And prayer is so vital! And that takes no public platform. Really, the ministry we came to do will be the same. Just a different channel.
Yesterday, as I was reading the One Year, I came across Exodus 40:34-37
So that's kinda where I'm at. I want the glory of God to so fill our lives and ministry! I want to be overshadowed and just have our lives so full of Him! But, like the children of Israel, we have to follow where the Spirit says to go. If the cloud rested, they stayed put. If it moved, they moved.
WHENEVER the cloud was taken up, the would GO.
But if the cloud was not taken up, they didn't journey. They didn't move TILL THE DAY IT WAS TAKEN UP.
We have been waiting on Him. Seeking Him. He said to sit still. We did. Now he says to move. We are. Well, were not MOVING as in moving our physical location. We will still be in Denver in our cute little townhouse. I mean, unless Jesus says something later. We will have to wait and see. But for now we know that this is the season where He has taken up the cloud and said to journey into the next thing.
And it just made me think as I was praying that someone reading this might need to hear this. It's important to be flexible and sensitive to the Spirit. It may not make sense to everyone around you, but if Jesus says to do it and it's in line with scripture and you prayed and fasted and sought counsel, well, step out my friend. Don't sit by as the Spirit moves into something new. Yes, it's petrifying, but isn't missing out on the move of the Spirit even more frightening??? I just feel like Jesus wants to remind us all the He sits in charge of the world so we can trust and obey and it truly will be good in the end.
I have no idea what the future holds for us. Honestly, my health is kinda tanking. I have some things going on that my neurosurgeon says isn't from the surgeries and so I have an appointment in two weeks to figure some of that out. But all of that to say, I'm not doing fabulous. I have moments when I can get up and do something, but each decision is calculated, knowing that a half hour at the park with the kids means at least two hours of pain lying down afterward. I can make it to church now, but I pay for it for hours later. It's been difficult to be honest. Is Jesus still being good to me? Uh ABSOLUTELY. I am so cradled in his is arms and we as a family are seeing Him in a new and more beautiful way than ever before. We have found our new church home at Mile High Calvary and the pastor there said yesterday "sometimes you have to fall down to be able to look UP" and that is exactly where I am at. I am brought low, but it's a good low if that makes any sense.
So that's where we are at. We have no clue, really. But we will stay where we are in Northglenn until the day Jesus says to do differently. Christian will continue to give his full energy to work. I will keep homeschooling and praying and trying to keep my gaze fixed on Jesus. We are just chasing His beauty through this wilderness and loving that He calls and guides and LOVES. He is just so beautiful.
