Sunday, August 25, 2013

Sing Like Never Before

I cannot believe that it is August 25th!  I just cannot wrap my mind around the fact that it is the end of August, that fall begins next month, that the leaves will begin to change and that colder weather will soon be on its way (last year we had our first snow fall the first week of October).  The summer has FLOWN by, and I realize what a cliche that is to say.  But it's true!  This has been a crazy, gnarly, awesome summer but it was so full that it flew away!

 This week has been a SUPER good week for my heart.
This week the Lord brought together a bunch of the stuff that has been rolling around in my brain waiting to be doused in His peace and love.  All summer, it has been so hot and SO DRY! I went from humid Texas summers to completely dry almost zero percent humidity Denver. And my soul has felt like it matched the weather.  I have been desperately awaiting a good thunderstorm, a good downpour upon the landscape of not just outside but also of my heart.
This week it has rained and stormed almost every single day!  It is gorgeous in the morning, in the 60's, you can run around and do what you please.  Then in the afternoon it heats up and the heat is followed by a cooling thunderstorm and wind and rain.  then it clears up and you go to bed.  Every day!  It has been so refreshing!  And my soul has felt like this too.  Every day I wake up, enjoy my sweet quiet time with my Savior and then comes the heat of the day.  And just when I feel like its getting too warm (go with my spiritual analogy hear okay?), then comes the rain, His Spirit just washing over my soul and making me more in love with Him.  He has been drawing me with His cords of love into the secret place of His sanctuary and I have been learning new littles pieces of His character, and some huge crazy wow Jo how did you never get that before pieces too!  It's been amazing.  In those times of being washed over, He has brought peace and love to areas that were just a ball of pain in my heart.  He has brought excitement where before there was just uncertainty and fear.  It has been a truly wonderful week.  This morning in my time with Jesus, I read this:


Psalm 40:2-5 completely rocked!  When we were still praying and planning to move to Denver, Alicia Sherbet introduced a new song during worship at church and I remember being almost literally knocked down by it.  In the chorus it says "sing like never before, O my soul, I'll worship Your holy name..."  and the Lord spoke to my heart and said basically, "I will make you sing like never before in Denver.  Your song to me will be more complete and more worshipful because of what I will do there.  Some of it WILL hurt.  Are you ready to sing like never before?"

Quite honestly, that scared me.  I wasn't really sure that I wanted to sing like never before if it was going to be a painful path to get there (I'm just being honest here).  But I knew the call Jesus had placed on us, so off we went.  Sometimes obedience is a choice.  And here I am.  I haven't reached the other side, Im not done learning this new song that He is teaching me, but I am so in love with the One who is teaching me.  And I am far enough in to hear His voice clearly speak to my heart of His love.  It begins like these verses begin.

 Verse 2: I see what He has saved me from, well as much as my puny mind can grasp it anyway.  I was in a miry clay pit and He brought me out.  That is always the beginning of the song we sing to Him, isn't it!?!  And every single day, He keeps saving us from our junk.  He is so glorious!!!

Next, HE has put a new song in my mouth, and it is one of praise.  Only He can put that song in my mouth.  I can't manufacture it.  But, by the power of His Spirit, I can open my mouth and let Him fill it with praise.

Then, people
see it,
hear,
fear, and
trust.  Oh I am praying for this to be true!!!  I want people to see His glory, hear of His majesty and be drawn into a real lasting abiding relationship with HIM!  I don't want to convince people, I want Jesus to be able to woo people through the beauty of His love song sung through His saints.  Isn't that  a beautiful picture of what the church is to be?  A bunch of love songs that draw people into His presence!  And we feel like this is a specific word for here, for now.  And that is crazy cool!

And that brings us to His wonderful works.  That is beginning to happen now!  Yes, we are seeing sweet relationships that began almost a year ago being brought deeper, questions being asked, fruit is beginning to happen for sure!  BUT the wonderful works that are blowing my mind this week are happening inside of me.  My heart has never felt lighter, more joyful, more trusting.  And that is a miraculous wonderful work of HIM!!!  Where I am normally fighting to be forgiving or loving or understanding or sacrificial, I find HIM doing HIS thing and knocking my socks off.  It's been beautiful.  I hope that doesn't sound like boasting.  Im only sharing that because it is a miracle really haha!  And because I am blown away by how much ministry really does need to begin in my own heart.  And when I say ministry I do NOT mean being a pastor's wife.  Anything you do for Jesus is ministry.  Loving your kids, your neighbors, your job, whatever.  That's ministry.  And that must begin in our own hearts.

So I guess my update from Denver this week is that He is in fact teaching me a new song to sing to Him.  It has been painful.  It has been beautiful.  And I am finally truly, down into my toes excited to learn it.

Monday, August 5, 2013

An Anchor of the Soul

So there's a ton floating around in my brain and my kids are about to wake up so I will try my best to see if I can get this out.  There have been SO MANY things that the Lord is speaking to my heart in the past couple of weeks.  Many of them I can't put into words yet because they haven't processed fully yet.  I haven't come to the other side yet.  Still walking in the lessons, so I don't have much to say about them yet.

But I will say that Jesus has been speaking about His Word.

To my heart.
To christian's heart.
Through times of prayer.
Through sweet people in our church.
His word keeps coming up, in all it's beauty.  And although the last few weeks have been a bit intense, I have to say that His word has kept me grounded.  Dominic Balli has an awesome song that I was listening to this week (okay all his songs are awesome, but this one in particular) and it says, "I've been in valleys and mountains, rest comes and peace like a fountain....His word keeps me grounded...I know You are there, You are there no matter where life goes, You are there..."  And I have to say, that has been so true this year.

Moving to Denver...leaving a loving, sweet church family...going somewhere that no one thought we should go...starting from nothing at all but the call of God in our hearts...it has been a walk of faith for sure.  It hasn't always been easy to discern what is our flesh and what is the heart of God.  We aren't perfect.  Just sinners who are so stoked to be saved that we just have to share it with others.  But in that, theres a lot of room to not be sure of what we are doing, how we should do it, if we are even hearing the heart of Jesus.

That's where the Word comes in.  The word of God has been like an anchor to me these past months and I have never been more in love with the Savior who bore my sins upon the tree for me because of it.  

Hebrews 6:19 tells us
"This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast..."

That is what God's word has been to me.  When my emotions want to run away like a kite in the wind...He is my anchor.  When waves are tossing the boat of life...He is my anchor.  When people hurt or disappoint or misunderstand...He is my anchor.

There are days when I just want to sit and listen to my Saviors voice speak and never leave my corner of the bedroom where I read each morning.  But that would be escapism and anyway God's word is my anchor, my strength, my shield....but that doesn't play out as me hiding away from the world.  If I am really hearing from Him, He will prompt me to get up...to share His love with anyone I meet...to pray with more diligence...to clean my house and feed my babies with a heart that knows how much that means to Jesus...to praise Him in the "everyday".

You see its in His word that I catch a glimpse of His glory...His nature...His character...His heart.  It's so easy in my mind or in this world to forget how loving He is, how HOLY He is, how much He loves the little children, how much His heart is for the outcast and the poor, how much He wants UNITY even among believers who differ in the minor areas.  Hey, it's in His word that we find the answers to those minor differences!
His word teaches us to pray.
His word shows us what worship is really to look like and to do in our hearts.
The model for parenthood and marriage and friendship and love...it's ALL FOUND IN HIS WORD!
There is nothing that I need that can't be found there.
And there are days when we read and think, "All righty then.  Hmmm.  That wasn't earth shattering."  But it is as we continually pour things into our heart, hide them there, make them our own, that He is able to link by link by link anchor us deeper and deeper into HIM.  

Like a boat in a storm, things might get rocky, but I wont be moved.  I mean, I will be moving up and down back and forth a bit, but I wont lose ground.  I won't wake up after the storm subsides and find that I am in the middle of the ocean, so far from where I wanted to be.  Because, lets face it, on our own we wander.  And we end up places we never thought we would be.

Feeling lost today?  A bit far from shore?  Dude, dig into His word!  Plan a time every day to say Lord I want to see Your face, hear Your heart.  I promise you, when you get to heaven NO ONE WILL SAY THEY WISHED THEY READ THEIR BIBLE LESS OFTEN.  It is a beautiful love letter from a Lover seeking to share His heart.  Let's not miss out on this anchoring, stabilizing gift that shows us the very heart of our God!  I am so thankful for this rocky season because I can honestly say it has been so good.  Things have been a bit tough here and there, but the GOOD that has come out of each difficulty FAR outweighs the difficulty itself.  Without God's word as my anchor, I know that in my flesh I would not be able to say that.  It is the very breath of God and transforms our hearts from the inside out, renews perspective, imparts wisdom and insight.  AGH! I could go on forever, and I hear my kiddos moving around so I will just wrap it up here.  Pray for me to dig deeper into His word every single day.  And I will pray the same for you.

Love from Colorado,